Wellbeing｜与你的情绪和平共处：愤怒篇（下）

与情绪和平共处

在讨论孩子生气的问题之前，我想邀请家长来想一想您上一次生气是什么时候？具体发生了什么？您生气的时候是为了保护什么？

Think about the last time you were mad. What exactly happened? Anger is triggered when we feel we need to protect something.  What were you trying to protect when you were angry? 

当我们想要保护我们的个人价值/利益，当我们想要争取公平的待遇，或者当我们试图保护我们关心的人时，我们避免不了愤怒的情绪。对于孩子们来说是一样的，当他们无法保护自己在意的事情时，他们也会生气。生气往往作为一个负面情绪出现在我们的生活中，但同时它也是一个向我们传递重要信息的工具。

Perhaps we wanted to protect our values/interests, wanted to fight for fair treatment, or wanted to protect those we care about.  This same sense of protection is true for children. When they cannot protect what they care about, they get angry, too. Anger often appears in our lives as a negative emotion, but it is also a tool to send us important messages.

在学校里，我们介绍了ABCDE五步法来帮助孩子们面对自己的怒气。在这里，我们也想把这个方法介绍给您，希望您也能引导孩子们在家里练习这些方法，来帮助孩子们找到他们真正想要保护的东西，并运用理性来找到解决问题的方法。

Particularly in the primary, we introduce the five-step ABCDE method to help children deal with their anger. With this method, parents can practice with their children at home as well so our younger students can be better at exploring what they want to protect and use logical thoughts to find solutions to problems.

对自己的情绪有清晰的认识是一个很重要的能力。这需要我们的身体沉浸在一个我们不是很舒服的状态，并且运用我们的理智来分辨我们具体的感受是什么。当孩子变得情绪化时，家长可以引导孩子来表达自己的感受，比如一些身体上的变化，内心情感的变化等等来帮助孩子确认自己正在经历的情绪。

Having a clear understanding of our emotions is a critical ability. It requires our bodies to be immersed in a state we are not very comfortable with and for us to use our reason to discern what we are feeling. When a child becomes emotional, you can guide the child to express his/her feelings through physical and inner dynamic changes to help the child identify the emotions he/she is experiencing.

深呼吸是一个能帮助我们快速冷静下来的方法。但是这个方法只有在本人认可，并且有过经验的情况下才能很好的起到作用。在学校，老师们会带领孩子在休息时间做各种呼吸练习来帮助他们放松身体和大脑。我们也建议家长在家中多和孩子一起练习深呼吸，这样当他们陷入情绪化的状态时，家长提醒孩子深呼吸，他们才更容易接受，并起到效果。

Deep breathing is a method that can help us calm down quickly. This method only works well if the individual agrees to it and has done it before. At school, teachers encourage students to do various breathing exercises during breaks to help them relax their bodies and brains. We also recommend you practice deep breathing with your children at home so that when they fall into an emotional state, it is easier for them to accept and become more effective in problem solving.

数数同样是一个简单且有效的帮助我们冷静的方法。我们推荐将数数和呼吸结合使用。在您带着孩子练习时，您可以和孩子一起数深呼吸的次数。这也可以降低深呼吸的速度。一般5次深呼吸为一个小组。您可以在一天不同的时段带着孩子做一组深呼吸。

Counting is also a simple and effective way to help children calm down. Use counting in combination with breathing. When you practice these two strategies together, count the number of deep breaths with your child. This helps lower the pace of deep breathing—usually, five deep breaths as a group. You can practice taking these sets of deep breaths with your child at different times of the day.

有一个对情绪友好的环境是很重要的，所以在孩子冷静下来前，最好将孩子和使他/她生气的对象分开。在学校，我们在班级里设立了 “休息角”，老师们也允许情绪波动较大的学生花一些时间来调整自己，也会根据学生的需要来提供指导和陪伴。在家里，家长也可以和孩子一起准备一个休息角，这个角落有各种可以安抚孩子的玩具或者游戏，帮助孩子放松并表达自己的情绪。

It is important to have an emotionally friendly environment.  Separate children from the object or person that makes them angry until they calm down.  In the primary, we set up a “take a break corner” in the classroom where students are allowed to take a break to process their mood. At the same time, teachers also will provide guidance and companionship according to the needs of the students. At home, parents can prepare a corner for your children. This corner may have a variety of soft toys or games to help children relax and express their emotions.

当孩子冷静下来后，他们需要表达自己，找到解决办法。在一般情况下，我们鼓励孩子自己来面对需要谈话的对象，并和对方商量找到可行合理的解决办法。家长可以根据孩子的情况，进行模拟对话练习。这可能是一个充满挑战的过程，家长要准备好给予更多的关怀和支持。

When children calm down, they need to express themselves and find solutions. In many cases, we encourage children to face the person they need to talk to and find a feasible and reasonable solution. Parents can practice simulated conversations based on their child’s situation. This can be challenging so parents should be prepared to give more care and support.

我们了解了情绪在我们生活中扮演的角色，

以及怎样更好地面对 “负面”情绪。

我们邀请大家一起来试一试这些方法！

每个家庭、个人面对的情况有所不同，

我们可以根据需要来进行调整。

希望这些小方法能帮助家长、老师和孩子们

更好地与情绪合作！

Learning about the role emotions play in our lives and how to better deal with “negative” emotions, we invite you to try these methods! Every family and everyone faces different situations, and you can adjust them according to your needs. We hope these methods can help our parents, teachers and students better working with emotions.